You can't buy math skills, God knows, I've tried. Since entering the ranks of college student, I've spent approximately five thousand dollars over the years and even with that sizable investment, let's just say my math skills will NEVER land me into a position that requires any sense of fluency in mathematical equations.
I thought I had paid my dues, and those days of public humiliation were behind me, a distant memory, OK, more like suppressed, nightmarish hell. My last attempt led to weekly pain. It never failed, the teacher would call on me, having changed the scope and requirements of the assignment as I walked from my desk to the front of the room. To add more humiliation he was ALWAYS sure to call on the "other" Lisa, who happened to work for NASA, and LOVED math. Every week she would exclaim "Math IS life!" I hated that statement. It grated on my last nerve much like Mrs. Smith's curled fingernails scraping down the blackboard. Much like a school girl, I found pleasure when others would mock her weekly declaration.
In the end of Public Humiliation 1 and 2, I received an A- covering material from Algebra through Trigonometry. To this day I believe the teacher graded me on my endurance, for my ability to hold it together. In ten weeks, he was unable to make me crack, not that he saw at least. I was built with an instinctual sense of not allowing others to see when they've hurt me, which he confused for spunk.
One week in class, he changed the format of the assignment, then added more than I had prepared for. That was a snapping point for me, when he suggested that I ENLIGHTEN the class. Not quite sure how to react, fighting back tears, seeing red, I glared back defiantly. "Once you have taught me, mater, to the point that I've reached mathematical enlightenment I'll be more than happy to share my experience. Until that time, this is the BEST you're going to get."
I figured I paid my dues by now, but I just received my latest schedule and lo and behold, they've signed me up for yet another math class. Maybe, just maybe this time around I will somehow get it, but I'm not going to hold my breath.
Monday, September 06, 2010
Tuesday, August 03, 2010
Dear Miss Manners
We have plans to visit a childhood friend of my boyfriend's. Everything was set, time and place. When the idea of visiting them was first brought to my attention it was more of a family get together. My boyfriend and his friend go back many years, to junior high school I think. Both now have kids, although our sons are much older than their children. It'll be a fun family time. To keep peace in my house, it sounds like a harmless idea. It keeps me out of the doghouse, and keeps that one issue that pops up with every disagreement. His one jab every time is that I NEVER like HIS friends. So, I told him I thought it would be great.
Well, that excitement for his reunion came to a screeching halt. Apparently he spoke to his childhood friend yesterday, and the guy announced that he paid for his wife to have a breast job. According to the conversation, it was well worth the $8000. However, as the conversation is being relayed to me, it seems THEY are quite proud of the new "additions". So proud of their investment that their conversation was interrupted because apparently her new girls were being displayed to and evaluated by a visitor that had stopped by. According to her husband, she just can't help it, she has to show them off to EVERYONE. So, being a good friend, he warned my boyfriend not to worry if she happens to flash the girls at him during our visit, she just wants EVERYONE to see and evaluate them.
You know, people should have a mute button for their lips, some sort of alarm goes off when they are straying off track and their brain is not activated to their speech, but unfortunately they haven't designed one as of yet.
Apparently while he was talking to me, I became distant, and he thought maybe the line had gone dead. He mumbled about that taking off as well as a lead balloon, and couldn't understand why I HAVE ISSUES? Hmmm...
So, let's recap, I am going to spend the day with a woman who happens to be maybe ten years younger than me, who has said, oh, maybe 2 words to me in the 5+ years that we've known of each other, and now has a tendency for showing off her chest to ANY guy who happens to be around, because she is just so damn proud of them. Her husband, as he put it, just doesn't know what to do about his wife's actions. One of the only reasons my boyfriend is still walking today is that he told his friend, you know, this could get awkward, I don't think Lisa will appreciate if your wife starts exposing herself while we're visiting. This was met with, well, I'll try to talk to my wife, but I can't guarantee that she'll listen. This great effort brought forth by the man who already was so excited to share the news himself including cost. Who watches as his wife is having them closely analyzed by ANYONE who happens to visit. Somehow that does not bring great comfort to me.
Now, I'm a pretty liberal thinker, I don't generally have issues with choices others make. Well, as long as those choices are not being flashed in the face of my significant other, or worse yet, my three teenage boys. Somehow, maybe it's just me, but I'm not seeing my issues in this scenario. If I choose not to accept this invitation, it is seen that I'm antisocial, and it'll justify his "see, you NEVER like my friends"; if I do go, someone WILL get hurt should the "girls" decide to make an appearance.
Exactly, how would Miss Manners handle this? Me, I'm just trying to determine who will be the first victim in my moment of rage, which is the one guarantee I can make.
Well, that excitement for his reunion came to a screeching halt. Apparently he spoke to his childhood friend yesterday, and the guy announced that he paid for his wife to have a breast job. According to the conversation, it was well worth the $8000. However, as the conversation is being relayed to me, it seems THEY are quite proud of the new "additions". So proud of their investment that their conversation was interrupted because apparently her new girls were being displayed to and evaluated by a visitor that had stopped by. According to her husband, she just can't help it, she has to show them off to EVERYONE. So, being a good friend, he warned my boyfriend not to worry if she happens to flash the girls at him during our visit, she just wants EVERYONE to see and evaluate them.
You know, people should have a mute button for their lips, some sort of alarm goes off when they are straying off track and their brain is not activated to their speech, but unfortunately they haven't designed one as of yet.
Apparently while he was talking to me, I became distant, and he thought maybe the line had gone dead. He mumbled about that taking off as well as a lead balloon, and couldn't understand why I HAVE ISSUES? Hmmm...
So, let's recap, I am going to spend the day with a woman who happens to be maybe ten years younger than me, who has said, oh, maybe 2 words to me in the 5+ years that we've known of each other, and now has a tendency for showing off her chest to ANY guy who happens to be around, because she is just so damn proud of them. Her husband, as he put it, just doesn't know what to do about his wife's actions. One of the only reasons my boyfriend is still walking today is that he told his friend, you know, this could get awkward, I don't think Lisa will appreciate if your wife starts exposing herself while we're visiting. This was met with, well, I'll try to talk to my wife, but I can't guarantee that she'll listen. This great effort brought forth by the man who already was so excited to share the news himself including cost. Who watches as his wife is having them closely analyzed by ANYONE who happens to visit. Somehow that does not bring great comfort to me.
Now, I'm a pretty liberal thinker, I don't generally have issues with choices others make. Well, as long as those choices are not being flashed in the face of my significant other, or worse yet, my three teenage boys. Somehow, maybe it's just me, but I'm not seeing my issues in this scenario. If I choose not to accept this invitation, it is seen that I'm antisocial, and it'll justify his "see, you NEVER like my friends"; if I do go, someone WILL get hurt should the "girls" decide to make an appearance.
Exactly, how would Miss Manners handle this? Me, I'm just trying to determine who will be the first victim in my moment of rage, which is the one guarantee I can make.
Monday, February 15, 2010
If You're Trying to Reach God, Please Leave Your Prayer Requests After the Tone
It's amazing what can happen to the mind while playing video games. It seems to consume portions of the brain, and transforms a usually mild mannered child, into Mr. Hyde.
Earlier today, he wanted to trade his brother because of the perceived lack of skills and understanding of the game. He protested that his brother was cross checking. When Rocky responded he had no idea how to cross check in the game, the argument turned to "See, you don't know HOW to play this game." I intervened and believe I do get to keep both children for the current season, however, I can't guarantee Rocky's contract with the SOC's if he doesn't pick up his gaming skills.
Later I hear him calling out to God. This is the picture I got in my head after hearing his tirades. "If you're trying to reach God, Please leave your prayer request after the tone. God will be sure to get back to you as soon as possible. It's seems the creator of all is busy right now, using all the energy available to rigging video games to assure that my youngest child doesn't have a chance to win at NHL 2010." I've heard him say "Oh my Freakin' God" way too many times, and apparently the omnipotent has decided to show Daniel his wrath for such statements.
Earlier today, he wanted to trade his brother because of the perceived lack of skills and understanding of the game. He protested that his brother was cross checking. When Rocky responded he had no idea how to cross check in the game, the argument turned to "See, you don't know HOW to play this game." I intervened and believe I do get to keep both children for the current season, however, I can't guarantee Rocky's contract with the SOC's if he doesn't pick up his gaming skills.
Later I hear him calling out to God. This is the picture I got in my head after hearing his tirades. "If you're trying to reach God, Please leave your prayer request after the tone. God will be sure to get back to you as soon as possible. It's seems the creator of all is busy right now, using all the energy available to rigging video games to assure that my youngest child doesn't have a chance to win at NHL 2010." I've heard him say "Oh my Freakin' God" way too many times, and apparently the omnipotent has decided to show Daniel his wrath for such statements.
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